Two Months into the Master's Degree

Dear Readers,
I recently decided to be a high school history teacher. I applied for and enrolled in a Master's program in Education at the University of Colorado, and after two years, I'll be a Master of Education, and have be certified to teach. YAY!

I kept finding myself calling / writing emails to my friend and former English teacher Peggy (you'll learn all about her soon). We decided it would be fun, and maybe even worthwhile to keep a running record of some of the things we talk about.

The content of this blog will end up being sometimes off-the-cuff, sometimes agonized over. Sometimes it'll pointless. Sometimes it'll be overblown introspection. Sometimes it'll be useful to you, but it's possible that a lot of it will just be a chance for me / me and Peggy to think through things that we need to think about. I can't speak for Peggy, but for my part, my public ruminations won't be brief. Be warned!

So with that, here goes my first public publishing...ever...that I can think of. Celebrations are in order...so I suppose I'll just call what I'm doing right now--spending time at a coffee shop with close friends--a celebration.


Well, let's kick this thing off with a whirlwind. Peggy, reader, prepare to be overwhelmed, and maybe even a little disoriented. This is an off-the-cuffer.

1) First, Peggy, remind me to sometime do an entry on my thoughts about what it was like to decide to enroll in the MA program. There were a lot of back and forth thoughts that concerned me--you know, all the, "Am I doing the right thing," things, and now, I'm pretty convinced that I am doing the right thing. I'm just touching on this now because I think it's useful for anyone going through it. For example, my girlfriend is going through med school apps now, and she's feeling those same cold feet doubts, but I'm betting after a year of med school, she'll be wondering why she ever doubted her certainty.

2) I'm psyched. I'm loving the academic setting so far, and believe it or not, I'm actually enjoying a lot of what I'm learning about at school. It's not crazy hard, or rigorous, and I've been looking for options to go above and beyond the call of duty. I'd love to try to publish...hence the blog...but I'd also like to try to publish an article in a journal or online publication. I think that speaks to my interest in being an academic. On that note, you should know that I'm planning a 10 year commitment to teaching before I do a good reconsideration--do I want to move onto education policy? Research? Administration? Keep teaching? Or move onto the next job.

I definitely see myself trying to balance being a classroom teacher with engaging in the discussion about education policy and theory. I think it would be sweet to contribute to something like "Rethinking Schools." Do you read any of those online publications?

3) I want to be the most awesome teacher that has ever been.

Seriously, that's kind of where I am. I recognize that maybe I don't have to be the best...but if there were a competition for teaching, I'd want to be on the winner's box. I guess there's an underlying drive for...not competition per se, but...excellence and recognition. Does that sound egotistical? Oh well, it's true. Is there any recognition for being a good teacher? Any prestige?

But that's just dealing with the egotistical, recognition side of it. Hmm...you know, I used to be able to lie (lay?) awake at night (I think it's lay), and I'd imagine lesson plans, and seriously not be able to sleep for HOURS. My brain would just be too excited, and I can't remember feeling that way about anything for a long, long time. Swim meets, maybe. Lately, that hasn't happened too much, but I think that's becasue I've been to concerned with keeping up with my coursework. Anyway, my point is, when I think about the future, and being a great teacher, it's not all about the fame and recognition and wild parties in my honor and parades and money, it's about how sweet I'll be in the classroom. Yes, it's all about me.

So that actually presented a problem for me the other day. I spend one day a week in a 6th grade social-studies classroom. Last week, I taught a class on the Constitution, and I realized how much I'd been focusing on the lesson that I forgot about the students. I asked a student his name, went on with the lesson, then realized that I had to ask the student his name again, 30 seconds later! What the hell? I'm good with people! I care about people! And I didn't care one little bit about this kid's name! OMG!

So, yeah. That was a lesson for me. Don't forget that the kids kind of matter too. In the grand scheme, I think this wasn't actually that big of a deal because it only happend because I spent like 10 hours on this lesson, so when I was in the classroom, that's what I was focusing on. But nonetheless, I would hate to be a teacher who cares more about making sure my lessons run smoothly than about the students...I guess, actually, that you could make a case for not needing to know every name in your 400 person college level course, and maybe that'd be worth thinking about. But not now.

4) I also have some really fun thoughts about teacher neutrality/partiality.

5) I also have some really fun thoughts about discussions / participation.

Well, I just realized something else. Peggy, if you never read this, and reader, if you never exist, it'll still be worth it for me, because between all the work I'm doing and the sleep I'm trying to get, I'd never get a chance to process all this information. So thank you blog, thank you screen, thank you forum for me to get all this out.


Thanks everyone! Shutting down, and don't let the bedbugs bite!